I hate to fix things but today I will do it.
What is the responsibility of father and mother?
I think Father’s is to protect his wife and children. Save them. He should be brave enough.
And mother should be gentle to husband and children. She sholud be a place to be safe for them.
That’s what I think mother and father’s responsibility is.
I sometimes have a dream about my boyfriend. He always doesn’t say any words I want to hear from him. And I always know that he never gives me smiles ever. It’s a slightly resembling a sad story. But he always make a big powerful laugh standing in front of me. So that I get involved into the funny feeling.
I have many things that I want to say to him. I always bring them in my mind for just in case I happen to meet him in town only with both of us. And these words change many times. I don’t always have the same words with me. But I am ready to meet him every single minute.
It is just a dream. It is just a regret about my past. So I usually don’t care and am not sure about this matter.
But it comes into my night dream sometimes. I feel sad. and somehow glad.
Were those nuts fallen at last night? Seems the wind was stronger. I had to step over them not to put its stinky smells to the bottom of my shoes.
Is there anything happening at Shinagawa station? Passengers seems more than usual and I saw the long line waiting for a taxi. Maybe some of the railways were stopping. I hoped that it wasn’t my line.. And helpfully it was not my railway. I could take a ride on the train and have seat as usual, except it seemed people were more in the green car. And I have heard that there was an accident at Odawara station. It is the station on my railway! But why it looks as usual? That’s curious.
Anyway, I hope it doesn’t cause a death.
And in Japan, the cool wind blows in the morning and evening. The power of the sun shine gets slowing down day by day. Oh, the winter will come soon. I wonder the weather report is loudly saying that it is expected many snow this winter. They knew it by checking the flow of Kurosio. I am happy in some part of mine and the rest is unhappy that the traffic must stop and suffer us to act hard to get to our office!
However, aside of any worries about winter, the warm and sun brightning autumun has come. It is now standing in front of my door or just me. And when I open my door or just look up and open my eyes, it gently smiles on me. And say, well lady let’s get ….
About my son, I chose much time to spare for him. I and my husband bought a Rumba, dish washer. They reduced my houseworking time a lot. And I get a green car ticket every morning for my travel time to work. It takes one hour. Now it becomes my prescious relaxing time. I can say that I couldn’t keep working if I hadn’t done this every morning. Mothers have to need this kind of only-myself time during the day.
And recently, I and my husband desided to hire house keeping once a week for two hours. I had been thought this over for a long time. It makes me feel guilty much more than buying dish washer and green car tickets. Why can I ask someone to clean my house despite I can do this, I should do this by myself by just making time for it? I thought this was too much for me.
But finally we desided to ask someone to support for keeping our house. And now I realized how it was a correct descision.
Because if someone helped to keep our bathroom, kitchen and living room clean, I can think about the other part to clean, like a side board with a mess of magazines and papers, living room windows and a chest for my cosmetics. I can now have time to spare for them! And if I could be done these, the house becomes more clean and staffs would be never left on the floor. It becomes a good cycle.
I think if I chose these luxe and got time to spare for myself and espesially my son who grows amazingly fast day by day moment by moment these days, I never feel guilty for that I don’t do housekeeping everday. Having this choice took lots of time for me. But I think it’s a natural thing and good thought.
So now, I focus myself more than before. Because I chose many things to replace my time from housekeeping to having fun everday. I am responsible for that. I have to be comparable with these luxury.
It was annular eclipse around 7:35am in Tokyo on May 21, 2012. It was almost cloudy so I didn’t expect to watch. But all of us in Tokyo area could see the ring of fire from break between clouds! First, I was amazed that the world became dark as I had never seen this kind of dimness.
Second, I didn’t know how a ring of fire looked both weired and beautiful at the same moment. Third, I was so moved by and enjoyed the atmosphere that we pedestrians couldn’t tell anything while looking up the sky for about a minute. Only clouds were flowing slowly between we and the gold ring. No sound. I remember.
The moon, a total black moon this time, was so big to cover our town. The moon was so far. So far and we people are so tiny.
I thank for every coinsidence to watch the ring of fire and the black moon in this morning. I hope the pedestrians’ happiness sorrounded me today. We had a same feeling and conditions for watching this natural phenomenon. It was great thing. I will never forget that beautiful moment.
